by peter » Fri Apr 15, 2005 10:48 am
Dear Sirs/Madam:
I am shocked and appalled by the content of recent posts on this site. These so-called "Stoners", whoever they are, have clearly lowered the moral tone of this website. Previously, only the purest of impulses motivated climbers when choosing routes names, like those around Gollum's Cave in Welsford, the "something slab", I don't recall just now, but I remember it made me feel good to climb there. Words like "nipples", "lap dance", and "bottom" were off limits to fine, upstanding Boards such as this. Climbing was never previously, to my knowledge, associated in any way with alcohol, certainly not with "strip clubs". Limericks, especially concerning body hair, never spread their pervasive dirt; rather, the nature poems of Shelley, Keats, and Wordsworth were all that were on climbers' minds, as they revelled in Nature. The Lord's name was never taken in vain, and certainly His infallible and recently departed representative here on earth, may God keep his soul, never suffered abuse such as I have read of late. I must protest the outrages perpetrated here daily, and urge members to say, "Get thee behind me Satan", should temptation raise its ugly head. Otherwise, "vengeance is mine sayeth the Lord", and he wasn't just whistling Dixie, despite his fondness for things Dixie, as our Great President Bush reminds us daily, may God protect him from evil. And don't ask Satan to do anything when he is behind you, either. He is not a safe belayer. I once saw him NOT using a Grigri, AND take is hand off the rope for a full SECOND, to scratch his nether regions. YOU ARE WARNED. Choose partners with care, and always wear a condom while climbing. Amen.
Signed
A Shocked and Appalled Climber
PS So, that was 10:30 on Saturday, at the Sobeys on Main Street, followed by the MicMac Beverage Room? See you there.